Thursday, January 26, 2006

Blow Up A Baby/Kiss A Baby – What’s the difference?

In the US the political process involves a lot of maneuvering to gain the proper, elect-able image.

You need to straddle that fine line of toughness but with compassion. You need to let business know that you will help them grow but let the people know you won’t let them abuse power. You have to show that you love children, kissing babies along the way.

But the recent Palestinian election has demonstrated that there are other ways to get that political edge. Rather than kiss children, they blow them up!

For some of us this might seem counter-intuitive but to the radical blood thirsty resident of Palestine (apparently more than 50% them), this is, apparently, very similar to farm subsidies and welfare.

One of the victors is Mariam Farhat, who sent three of her sons to their death as suicide bombers/terrorists ..uh, freedom fighters. I always thought potty training my children, teaching them to tie their shoes, and then cheering them on at sporting events was parental duty. Apparently, teaching them how to strap on a bomb and cheering them on into a crowd of civilians is the next earmark of positive parenting. Now that’s tough love.

She was actually quite the poster child for the Hamas election. They are progressive after all, allowing woman into the political process. I am sure NOW supports her post birth abortions.

This must discourage those who worked with Yassar Arafat all those years. I can imagine them talking amongst each other…

“All these years, I thought we had to pretend we wanted peace. But we just needed to openly kill of few more of our children. We didn’t have to lie.”

Well, I could have told them that honesty is the best policy.

I’ve received a few letters on the topic and thought I should share them with you.

This is an amazing day. I waited until I was in power to let my intentions be known. I wish I could re-enter the political process as a write in candidate. I am sure the Palestinians would give me their vote.
Sincerely,
Adolf Hitler

Now I see the error of my ways. I was always pretending to be Jesus Christ and I ended up in prison. If I had just pretended to be a prophet of Allah my actions would have resulted in a term in parliament not a jail term.
Peace,
Charles Manson

This is all a well-crafted plot by George Bush to divert the attention away from Samuel Alito, the demon-possessed, dove eating judge. We have unnamed sources that prove this.
Honestly yours,
Michael Moore & Oliver Stone

I am sure that more will show up soon.

8 comments:

  1. Anonymous2:20 PM

    Pop quiz: A bunch of Germans & Russians turn up one day in your country & start building homes for themselves. They don't use local labour - only their friends & family, and they buy up land aggressively until they own most of the land that can be developed, and your people have no jobs. When other Germans and Russians commit awful atrocities on their friends back in the old country, the rulers of your country, who live in the UK, promise those people a homeland in your land. At the same time, they promise you a homeland in your land, but they never act upon this, referring instead to give your land which your people have farmed fro hundreds of years to the foreigners. Then those Germans & Russians gather weapons and drive you out of your villages, herd you into refugee camps, and then build towns near the camps which sink wells deep into the water table. When the teenage kids of the settlement fire Uzis down into your waterless camp, and you retaliate, foreign-made helicopters rain missiles down on you, and armoured bulldozers & tanks push over your houses, often with your people inside. Some of your people make it to a neighbouring country, whose capital is regarded as "The Paris" of your region - a city to which Hollywood stars came for their vacations. The occupiers of your land invade that country too and bomb the bejesus out of it until the name of that city becomes a byword for a distopian nightmare of factions endlessly murdering each other in a ruined shell of a place.The Germans & Russians then elect a guy who was responsible for at least two massacres of your people. The UN makes numerous resolutions against your oppressors, but nobody turns a hand to help you. Even when you resist, the bodycount is in the region of 10 to 1 in favour of the oppressors. What do you do?

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  2. Oh... okay. Thank you for that fount of clarity. Now strapping bombs to your kids makes sense.

    Perpetuating the myth of Palestinian innocence & nobility in the face of everyone else's brutality is a shrill and untruthful whine. While most people – even Israelis – are willing to admit that both sides need to offer concessions – this is something that murderers like Hamas are unwilling to do.

    It is sad that anyone would consider a Hamas political victory as anything but a grotesque tragedy for Palestine.

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  3. Anonymous3:12 PM

    Honestly, you can't say that the Palestinians' actions have been whiter than white, but in the face of Israeli actions they're frankly grey vs charcoal. Neither is the ultimate evil, and neither is the ultimate good. Neither has a god-given right to the land, though IMHO the Palestinians have more recent and therefore greater claim.

    Who would you have supported in the '60's in Northern Ireland? The Protestants, who had 90% of the businesses, and who subjected the Catholic communities to sporadic beatings and murders, or the Catholics, who had a 10% chance of getting a job despite representing 50% of the population?

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  4. Anonymous3:23 PM

    While most people – even Israelis – are willing to admit that both sides need to offer concessions – this is something that murderers like Hamas are unwilling to do.

    Note also that Hamas have moved from a "Destroy the State of Israel" stance to one of "Armed resistance against occupation" - isn't this a concession? Essentially it says "Get out of our country, stop murdering our people, and we can think about being friends."

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  5. Anonymous7:10 PM

    One last little addendum - on 6th Feb '01, Ariel Sharon won the Israeli election, pledging no negotiations with the Palestinians till the intifada ended. The next week, Massoud Ayad, one of Yasser Arafat's bodyguards, was killed by an Israeli helicopter gunship, the first Palestinian official killed since New Year's Eve. 6 days later, Israel killed Mahmud Madani, a Hamas leader. On 27th March the non-aligned states put forward resolution SC/7040 at the UNSC, calling for UN observers to protect the Palestinians. This was vetoed by the US alone. In April / May 2000, Israel attacked refugee camps and re-occupied areas under Palestinian authority control. By August 2001, 6 months later, 154 Israelis were dead, including 28 minors. 495 Palestinians, of which 123 minors were also dead.
    After 9/11, Arafat met with Shimon Peres to try and arrange a truce, but this failed. Between 9/11 and NYE2001, 75 more Israelis (8 minors) and 252 Palestinians (42 minors) were killed. These figures are from the Israeli human rights organisation, B'Tselem. To cut a long story short, by September 2003, 795 Israelis, of which 100 were kids, and 2,235 Palestinians (409 minors) had been killed. Not Hamas' figures - B'Tselem's.

    Quote from Moshe Dayan in 1955: "What cause have we to complain about their fierce hatred for us? For eight years now they sit in their refugee camps in Gaza, and before their eyes we turn into our homestead the land and villages in which they and their forefathers have lived"

    I recommend you have a read of "Bad News from Israel" by Greg Philo and Mike Berry, of the Glasgow University Media Group. It contains a short potted history of events in the region, along with bodycount figures like those above, and then the remaining 75% of the book is taken with an extensive content analysis of media coverage of the conflict, audience studies (which reveal things like, of UK students asked "Who is occupying the Occupied Territories?" only 9% knew it was Israel & not the Palestinians who were the occupiers - 29% in th US) - point being that not all you see in the news is unbiased, and frankly most of what you see is highly canted in the Israelis' favour. A muslim kid gets killed, the report goes "Another victim of the violence" or "The killing goes on..." killed by who? An Israeli is killed, they go into detail about the fact that it was an Arab who did it, who his family were, how could he have come to this, etc. You're left with no doubt when it's Arab killing Israeli, but these dead Arabs just keep turning up and rarely are they linked to Apaches launching hellfires into crowded streets. Read the book, and you'll want to scream, I promise. It's as balanced as any academic work can be, quoting figures from mainly Israeli sources, but the truth still glares out at you.

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  6. Anonymous4:14 AM

    You know what, you’re right. I concede. Israel bad! Kill Israel. Hamas - good, pure and noble. Mariam Farhat and other’s like her - sending their bomb laden children to blow up civilians – good parenting and good politics. Hamas and other freedom fighters - targeting civilians and then hiding behind their families so that when their families die they can cry foul – heroes, victims and martyrs – not to mention, savvy PR folk. Madison Avenue has nothing on them.

    Israelis who, by overwhelming majority, support Palestinian statehood but want their own existence recognized – intolerant and unrealistic – run to the ocean you Zionist pigs. Stupid money grubbin’ Jews!

    Wow. I feel enlightened.

    I apologize, I was under the misguided impression that both sides would have to recognize the other and work together for peace. I realize now that the only true solution – the final solution – well.. *wink* *wink* - you know what I mean.

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  7. Anonymous12:37 PM

    No, the only soluton is a single state in which everybody's needs are addressed; where no-one is allowed to discriminate against people on purely racist grounds (e.g. the Jewish National Fund, which decreed in 1901 that all land it bought could never be resold or even leased to gentiles). Even Ahad Ha'am, the Zionist leader & thinker, said that the settlers in his day (as far back as 1891) "...treat the Arabs with hostility and cruelty, and unscrupulously deprive them of their rights, insult them without cause and even boast of such deeds; and none opposes this despicable and dangerous inclination".

    You kick a whole people off their land & force them to live in the worst possible land, the land that even your poorest wouldn't want, then call that land "their country", and the land you killed their fathers for "your land" - a 2 state solution like that would never work. You need reconciliation. The only way you're going to do that is by opening a dialogue between even the most hardline people on both sides.

    When Ariel Sharon was elected, did you make similar posts? If not, why not? He's a former terrorist, responsible for at least 2 crimes against humanity - mass-murders of civilians in refugee camps. You could howl for his blood as a war criminal, spit on the earth and swear nobody should ever speak with such a man - but look: in the last year he's made massive strides towards peace, pulling out of Gaza and so forth. If such a man can do this, why not Hamas? Sadat and Begin did it in '79.

    If you get the most peace-loving types from either side, and get them to draw up a treaty, it wouldn't be worth the paper it was written on. It'd be broken by the hawks on each side in hours. Get the hawks talking, and you might have something worthwhile. This is what they've done in Northern Ireland, and it seems to be working.

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  8. Well, couple items. My post was not about the claim to the land. I don't even think I had this blog when Sharon entered power. Even then, I would probably not have addressed the issue. I need to see a clear humor/satire angle to cover news stories.

    On many of your most recent points, I agree. Certainly, negotiations are needed and I agree that the most aggressive (and politically powerful) must be the ones at the table.

    My post was really a satirical look at kissing babies and blowing up babies as a way to political power. I still view it as incredibly bizarre and sad. Most of my post are odd musings about ordinary things. Online debate is typically contention without reason - I typically reserve such debate for times when both parties can meet face to face over a cup of coffee.

    FYI: I am a registered independent, morally conservative, socially liberal.

    While I welcome the comments, I am no longer that interested in the topic as a blog discussion. I'm on to sex as therapy for stress for public speakers.

    You see the difference?

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